


i’m missing you

by rydellon



Series: fictober 2018 [4]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: ?? - Freeform, Angst, Fictober 2018, Gen, Maybe - Freeform, Reincarnation, day four: reincarnation, i cant write so, im so tired, this is a mess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-04
Updated: 2018-10-04
Packaged: 2019-07-25 06:14:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16191737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rydellon/pseuds/rydellon
Summary: now that he’s remembered, chan can’t forget.





	i’m missing you

**Author's Note:**

> this is a whole ass mess. 
> 
> i just need to get it over with tbh.

the minute chan remembered, he was alone.

 

in this generation, this century where everything was connected by technology and chan could have _all the friends in the world_ , he missed the people he couldn’t have.

 

he missed the three oldest, always babying him even though he was _twenty goddamnit jeonghan hyung i’m fine!_ although it was slightly annoying he secretly enjoyed it most of the time, being babied by his hyungs made him happy, made him feel special.

 

he couldn’t feel special now. not without them here.

 

next were four more hyungs who took care of him. two, he remembers, he was really close to. they were in the same mini unit, having grown close after they had debuted they helped him dance, express himself, keep himself safe. he never thanked them enough. another helped him write, helped him grow and evolve his abilities, making him a better person. the last had lifted him up when he fell down, helped him feel better.

 

he had none of these people to lift him up now.

 

his life was basically desolate, the same routine filled with white and technology and _nothing_.

 

he missed them so much.

 

he missed them all, another three who always had his back. they all always cared for him, the one in his unit, the two who were not.

 

the three were always available for him to depend on, and he was so thankful to them for that.

 

all of them.

 

then, the youngest two.

 

besides him. he was the youngest. he was _their_ youngest.

 

he felt closest to them, even though he didn’t really feel the age gap with the others, there were times where they seemed to be millenia away.

 

those two were there at that time.

 

there for him when the others were miles away, there to calm him down.

 

all of them, his twelve, built him up.

 

he regretted choosing to get his memories back, the only hurt him more.

 

he knew there were online forums for finding people from your past lives, but the implants weren’t common, and chan couldn’t bet on them having them as well.

 

god, it really hurt to miss them.

 

the ache went deep into his chest, carving out a hole where his heart had been. he retreated into himself, spending most of his time looking and sorting through his memories, or watching videos of them.

 

them and him.

 

god, he hoped his past self knew how lucky he was.

 

—-

 

his parents were taking him to get it removed.

 

they made him an appointment, he just had to get himself there.

 

they wouldn’t understand.

 

he was just going to cancel the appointment. so what if they thought his memories were making him _moody and intolerable chan, your father and i will not stand for this anymore._

 

he couldn’t lose them.

 

not again.

 

the clinic looked the same as when chan first went, pristine, white.

 

boring.

 

he walked up to the counter and after a short talk with the receptionist, smiled and exited the shop.

 

he placed his headphones in his ears and music started playing, making him oblivious to the outside world until a hand landed on his shoulder.

 

whipping out an earbud, he glared at whoever it was who touched his shoulder, turning to face an unknown girl.

 

he tilted his head, making the girl smile.

 

“would you happen to be lee chan?” she asked. her hair was a pretty shade of brown, chan thought.

 

then he thought about why she knew his name.

 

“yeah, uh, that’s me,” he said, and the girl brightened up.

 

she stuck her hand out towards him, “hi chan,” she said, “i’m kim mingee.”

 

kim…mingee.

 

“can i hug you,” mingee asked, and chan took a step away. she reminded him too much of…no.

 

“mingee, stop, you’re going to overwhelm him,” another person put their hand on mingee’s shoulder and chan looked up at…

  


“hao?”

 

minghao smiled.

 

“i'm afraid it’s myungho, but close enough,” he said, face splitting into a grin.

 

“a—but—how?” chan stuttered, longing to wrap his arms around minghao—myungho’s waist. he was more buff now. chan liked it.

 

“lee chan, we have some people we’d like you to meet,” mingee said.

 

she grabbed his wrist and the grip seemed to trigger something in chan.

 

“mingyu hyung?” he asked.

 

her face split into a grin.

 

“mingee noona now chan ah!” she giggled, and myungho hit her.

 

“come on chan, they’re waiting.”

 

chan’s face split into a wide grin.

 

turns out, his life didn’t have to be bland without them after all.


End file.
